Magical Meals: A Pinch of Love, a Crumbled Leaf of Revenge

Jaded Love Junkie is having a “Blogofeast” today, with everyone blogging about food! Head over to her site to see who else is participating.

Today, in honor of DJ Jaco, the Green Congress wizard who’s the heroine of my upcoming urban fantasy series for Tor Books, I’ll be offering up some of her favorite herbs and other edibles and what they might be used for. Of course, DJ hates to cook, so she has to come up with more creative ways to get the herbs to her intended targets–but you can just add them to recipes. (Also, just for the sake of transparency, sometimes DJ’s concoctions go awry.)

ALLSPICE is a fine addition to pumpkin pie, and it promotes healing. So if you burn yourself taking the pie out of the oven, you can eat the whole thing and call it medicinal.

If you have a fever, eat a few ALMONDS. And then use the almond tree wood to carve a nice magic wand–it’s a good conductor of magical energy.

Samhain is coming up if you’re into such things, and APPLES are considered one of the foods of the dead. So forget the candy corn and wax fangs. Make an apple pie for halloween.

Got a real witch in your life? Give her an apricot, which is supposed to induce a sweet attitude. Then stick the pit in your pocket to attract love.

BASIL has all kinds of useful properties. Sprinkle it around your property to keep goats away, or seep it into a strong tea and it will give you the ability to fly. I’d suggest trying this on the ground first. DJ hasn’t had much luck with it.

Eating BLUEBERRY pie while unde psychic attack will ward off evil. It will also leave you with blue teeth.

If you want to incite lust in your guy, bake him something with CARAWAY SEEDS in it. Just have him floss before it goes further.

CHICORY, a popular root in traditional New Orleans coffee that adds to the strong, bitter taste, is a favorite ingredient of DJs, as it promote invisibility. There’s a catch, though. The chicory has to be gathered at noon or midnight during midsummer using a gold knife. DJ finds it easier to just order it from the Congress of Elders’ secure website.

Add CORIANDER seeds to heated wine to induce lust. DJ believes it’s the wine and not the coriander that contributes to this effect, but a little extra incentive never hurts.

Got some lusty lunkhead who’s had too many coriander seeds and just won’t take no for an answer? Give him a slice of CUCUMBER to squelch lust. Or DJ’s favorite–make a Pimm’s Cup: Mix Sprite and Pimm’s Liqueur, serve in a tall glass with a slice of fresh cucumber. Drink enough and Mr. Lusty might start looking good.

If you live on the coast. chew up some GINGER and spit it in the sea to stop an oncoming storm. DJ wishes she’d known this spell before Hurricane Katrina.

A cheating spouse can be set on a straight course with a slice of LEMON pie. But if everyone did that, what would all those divorce lawyers do for a living?

Can’t sleep? Rub LETTUCE JUICE on your forehead. Don’t use your good sheets.

Take a white ONION, stick it full of black-headed straight pins and put it in your window to guard your home against evil intruders and venomous beasts. (Might want to put some Febreeze on your shopping list, too.)

PISTACHIOS are good for calming zombies and helping them return to their graves to rest in peace. Getting the zombie to eat the pistachio before he digs into your brains is the trick. DJ is really, really, really scared of zombies.

Go forth, cook, and be merry!

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About Suzanne Johnson

Author of urban fantasy, paranormal romance, and suspense. As Suzanne Johnson, she is the author of the Sentinels of New Orleans urban fantasy series (Royal Street; River Road: Elysian Fields, Pirate's Alley, Belle Chasse, Frenchmen Street (March 2018). Writing as Susannah Sandlin, she is the author of the Penton Legacy series (Redemption; Absolution; Omega; Storm Force; Allegiance; ILLUMINATION); The Collectors series (Lovely, Dark, and Deep; Deadly, Calm, and Cold); and the Wilds of the Bayou series (Wild Man's Curse; Black Diamond).

13 thoughts on “Magical Meals: A Pinch of Love, a Crumbled Leaf of Revenge

  1. Thanks for visiting, guys–it was fun to dig through my “magical herb” dictionary for food items! (I got a couple of ideas for Halloween, too!)

  2. Is that a pit in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

    What a unique approach to the blogfest! I love the variety I’m seeing so far. My fav: Drink enough and Mr. Lusty might start looking good. LOL!

    And how did you know I personally eat lots of pistachios to make sure I’m not a zombie (usually after not getting enough sleep)???

  3. This was unique and inventive. I know a few people I can give pistachios to! lol

    Sorry I’m a day late. I forgot about the fest (first time). I have posted anyway in case you are so inclined to stop by.